There I was, standing in front of the mirror with a red face. Staring at the muffin top hanging over the jeans I had just struggled with to put on. One of the few jeans that still fit though, All the others were already banned to the ‘might be able to wear them again someday’ pile. This couldn’t go on anymore I decided, something had to change!
When I was eleven my health problems started . Always tired, always a headache. After endless research I turned out to have Lyme disease en some other things. My high school years existed out of hospital visits and on average I went to school once a week. My health issues were real but also something to hide behind. ‘running? I couldn’t do that with my headache.’ I ended up as an energyless pile of misery zapping on the couch with 2 bags of chips next to me.
Imre, the girl who had grown on the 4 P’s; Pizza, Pasta, Pancakes and Potatoes (as in French Fries). As a baby I already didn’t want to have anything to do with vegetables and as I grew older I refused to even take a bite of anything belonging to the veggie family.
My gap year in England was a great opportunity to enjoy unhealthy foods even more. And that bit of lettuce and tomatoes on my burger? With a face of disgust I took those off cause ‘yuck’. Unsurprisingly I gained a lot of weight in England and caused my mum a real shock when I came back. Was this really the same daughter she had waved goodbye?
I’ve always been sporty but I never pushed through. Finally I decided to start using that gym membership and actually train seriously. Five times a week, through storm and rain, I walked to the gym. I started with the simple stuff, but the weight room, it had a magic appeal to me. Nevertheless it was scary, was I brave enough to go in there? Filled with strong man, rarely a woman and oh so much moaning. ‘What if people would stare at me?’ ‘What if I did something wrong?’ Getting over that fear was one of the best things I’ve ever done. The weight room is my home now and I almost always get greeted when I come in.
You can probably imagine that the change to eating healthily was a turn of 180 degrees. What made this even more difficult was my gluten, lactose and soy allergy which I finally started to take seriously. Was I even allowed to eat something? I really struggled with this. The restrictions to eat healthier were my own choice, I could live with that. But every once in a while I wanted to eat something really yummy too and most times I tried an ‘intolerant proof’ recipe it ended in a huge disappointment. As a result I started bingeing and at these moments I tried to stuff myself with as much gluten and lactose in as possible.
I went through this journey on my own and sometimes it made me feel so alone. Especially in the beginning there wasn’t much understanding and people mainly found it weird. ‘going to the gym again?!’ ‘bringing your own food?!’ Nevertheless I kept on fighting and didn’t give up. Every one has their ups&downs and I am very proud that I got myself out of every ‘down’.
Right now I’m not so alone anymore, I’ve got all of you here by my side! I am extremely grateful for all of your support and hope that I manage to motivate you as well. Right now I am following a course to become a personal trainer and I can’t wait to share more tips etc on my blog soon.
I know how difficult it is to change your life around and have a massive amount of respect for anyone trying. Don’t forget; What I did, You can do too!
For a more informative post about my transformation click here!
For the original Dutch version click here!
Oh and if you were reading this on your computer and got harrased by those annoying links. Super sorry for that, tried to get rid of them for an hour but they won’t got away.